That's the 16+4+4 I mentioned above. 16 for graphics (and general usage, really), 4 for NVMe (or, again, anything, really), and 4 for the chipset link. The chipsets only provide PCIe 2.0 (8 lanes for 70-series, 6 for 50). So if you want/need more than one full-speed NVMe SSD (which is growing more likely as time passes), you need to eat into the 16 GPU lanes, which means that no/few motherboards will provide more than one NVMe port from the CPU-connected lanes - they'll use the chipset 2.0 lanes instead. Of course, running your GPU at x8 isn't actually a problem, but this requires a riser card for the SSD.
Yes, it depends on drivers - SLI profiles in the drivers, specifically. SLI has zero effect without a bespoke profile for the game in question (activating it in a game without a profile usually leads to a tiny but measurable performance drop, bugginess, or nothing at all happening). For some games, modders even make their own profiles, with varying success. The only difference between SLI and DX12 multi-GPU in this regard is that the effort lies with Nvidia and not the developer. The statement that "all games will run fine in a dual GPU config" is thus either false (no performance scaling without a profile) or meaningless (defining "running fine" as not requiring performance scaling, invalidating the point of SLI).
As for the 2070 having SLI,
there are no SLI fingers visible on the back of the board (scroll down for a picture of the back).
For previous cards, the SLI fingers needed a cut-out in the backplate, so unless they've redesigned the entire SLI interface, it doesn't have it. There isn't room to fit the bridge connector between the backplate and the PCB, so a cutout or fingers sticking up past the backplate would be necessary. The NVLink slot is also visible from the back on the 2080/- TI. Nvidia cut SLI from the third-largest die (then the 60-series) previously, so it's no surprise if they keep to this line even now that the third-largest die is in the 70-series.
SLI gives you the ultimate performance in the (relatively few) games that support it for the people who can afford it, but given the cost and what you gain back, it's an utter waste of money.