I have come up a plan for a less intrusive, but more expensive fix for my screaming cat 4090 Spurim X.
I will transplant it into a "be quiet!" Silent Base 601 solid padded case, with only 2 fans in for SSD and motherboard VRMs, everything else closed off. Cooling will be provided by a Mo-Ra3 360. Without RGB and fancy glass case to look at, I can move the PC under my desk or perhaps even further away. If this doesn't solve the problem, I will try to add more foam around the card, and if that doesn't work, I will throw the whole thing off a bridge.
I chose this particular case because it should let me mount my gpu waterblock horizontally, since it has a max CPU cooler height of 185mm (other cases are usually 155-165). Kind of a shame to hide the custom loop, but at this point, I don't really care how it looks anymore, I just want a card that will let me focus more on a game than the changing pitch of the buzzing as I move around.