Steam Skyrim Contest !!

Deleted member 24505 · Nov 19, 2011

Damn_Smooth said:
It gets me when someone doesn't capitalize their i's.

I is used quite a lot though, so capitalizing it would be a pita, so i don't usually bother.

stinger608 · Nov 19, 2011

Kreij said:
Bah ... The members on TPU are the best, most helpful people I've ever met on the internet.
They are biased, judgemental, trolling asshats who toss that to the side when someone really needs help, and they are always there when you need them.
I just want to give something back to the community of worthless bastards who make dealing with computer problems a lot less frustrating and who always pitch in when someone has a problem with either software or hardware.

I said that in the kindest way possible, and that's why I am proud to call TPU "home".

Just could not say this better!!!!!! TPU is the win :rockout:

theJesus · Nov 19, 2011

tigger said:
I is used quite a lot though, so capitalizing it would be a pita, so i don't usually bother.

punctuation is used a lot so putting commas periods apostrophes etc would be a pita so i dont bother correting any typso i make in ym spelilng would be a ipta so wh y bothre hellwhyevenbotherwithspacesimeanthosegetusedalotandmythumbgetsprettytiredafterawhilesowhocares

Komania · Nov 19, 2011

Kreij said:
While I appreciate the grammar and spelling lessons, remember who has the banstick.

What, did the top break off the banhammer?

:3 Looking forward to results most gracious one

stinger608 · Nov 19, 2011

Komania said:
What, did the top break off the banhammer?

:3 Looking forward to results most gracious one

Jesus, sucking up??????

Komania · Nov 19, 2011

stinger608 said:
Jesus, sucking up??????

Not really, I was more trying to make up for making fun of his banstick

Well not "making fun" per se

Damn_Smooth · Nov 19, 2011

Komania said:
What, did the top break off the banhammer?

:3 Looking forward to results most gracious one

The hammer only comes out for people too stupid to learn with the stick.

Komania · Nov 19, 2011

Damn_Smooth said:
The hammer only comes out for people too stupid to learn with the stick.

Well that explains it lol

Kreij · Nov 19, 2011

After a lot of reading and re-reading of the post the results are in.
This was not an easy one to decide as there were many good entries, which is why I asked a couple of people for input (they will remain anonymous).

The winner is .... SOLARIS17

His entry was painful to read as his spelling, grammar and punctuation cause me nightmares.
However, he may have entered the first forum post I have ever read that was immersive and pulled me out of TPU and into his own world.
His analogy about his sister making lasagna was classic.

Thanks to all who entered and as always, I will have more contests soon.

@Solaris : PM me the e-mail you use for your Steam account.

Komania · Nov 19, 2011

Congradulations to Solaris

This was fun, looking forward to the next one.
Looks like I'll have to find another way to acquire Skyrim though

stinger608 · Nov 19, 2011

A huge congrats to Solaris17!!!!!!!!!!

Very much well deserved! Awesome choice Kreij!

theJesus · Nov 19, 2011

I just got done reading his entry . . . epic.

stinger608 · Nov 19, 2011

theJesus said:
I just got done reading his entry . . . epic.

+1!!! That was an epic story Solaris17 told!!!!!! Very well deserved for sure. :toast:

Kreij, you better close this thread........real soon bro LOLOLOL

qubit · Nov 19, 2011

Congrats solaris, that was an awesome post! :toast:

Solaris17 · Nov 19, 2011

holy shit! I didnt really think I would win I'm one of those people that just dont win anything ya know? Not to mention reading some of the others got me a little discouraged your use of punctuation and formatting out classes mine. Thank you all so much. and to the rest of the contenders it was a hell of a battle you guys had some amazing rants. Props to all who participated!

Black Panther · Nov 19, 2011

Congrats Solaris!

Say good-bye to your real life now

Kreij · Nov 19, 2011

Solaris17 said:
holy shit! I didnt really think I would win I'm one of those people that just dont win anything ya know? Not to mention reading some of the others got me a little discouraged your use of punctuation and formatting out classes mine. Thank you all so much. and to the rest of the contenders it was a hell of a battle you guys had some amazing rants. Props to all who participated!

Sol, I had to read that post three of four times and each time it was painful because of the grammar and punctuation, but that was not what this contest was about.
I could almost smell the day old cigs and feel the frustration from your post. The funny commnet about your sister's failed lasagna made it personal and I just imagined being there.
Your post was immersive, and I've never seen that before in a forum post.
If you ever decide to learn to write and become an author, I'll buy all your books. You have a very unique way of looking at and describing things.

Prize sent. Let me know if there are any problems with receiving it. :toast:

stinger608 · Nov 19, 2011

Kreij said:
You post was immersive, and I've never seen that before in a forum post.
If you ever decide to learn to write and become an author, I'll buy all your books. You have a very unique way of looking at and describing things.

Could not agree more!!! Almost like reading a book......Without proper grammar and punctuation LOL.

None the less, very awesome post Solaris!!! You really could write books if you had a proof reader man. Just coooooool man.

Solaris17 · Nov 19, 2011

Kreij said:
Sol, I had to read that post three of four times and each time it was painful because of the grammar and punctuation, but that was not what this contest was about.
I could almost smell the day old cigs and feel the frustration from your post. The funny commnet about your sister's failed lasagna made it personal and I just imagined being there.
Your post was immersive, and I've never seen that before in a forum post.
If you ever decide to learn to write and become an author, I'll buy all your books. You have a very unique way of looking at and describing things.

Prize sent. Let me know if there are any problems with receiving it.

stinger608 said:
Could not agree more!!! Almost like reading a book......Without proper grammar and punctuation LOL.

None the less, very awesome post Solaris!!! You really could write books if you had a proof reader man. Just coooooool man.

Thanks guys I appreciate it. I just dont know what to say.

Kreij · Nov 19, 2011

Besides the other people who I asked for comments on the winner, it seems I was not alone in feeling that Solaris's post was extraordinary for a contest entry here on TPU.

I hereby vow not to beat Solaris with a bratwurst too many times if he comes to Wisconsin to visit. :laugh:

theJesus · Nov 19, 2011

Kreij said:
I hereby vow not to beat Solaris with a bratwurst too many times if he comes to Wisconsin to visit.

There are so many jokes racing through my mind right now . . .

Kreij · Nov 19, 2011

Next contest (which is going to have an awesome prize) is going to involve writing again (not sure what yet).
Doing a graphic arts kind of contest takes out too many people as a lot of us suck at that, but in my contests I want people to do a little work and have a little fun with it. Writing something seems to be a good method for contests on a forum (remember the "abuse the mods" contest? lol)

Get ready to use your brain a little more than usual.

Solaris17 · Nov 19, 2011

theJesus said:
There are so many jokes racing through my mind right now . . .

damric · Nov 20, 2011

Solaris17 said:
It was 0137 EST zero hour. I was enjoying a cig or 2, quietly browsing the steam store. While my investigation of the current deals proved fruitful I came across what I thought was a jewel, While my cart was almost completely full brimming with the new binaries I managed to purchase on my mediocre salary I was cheerful and soon to be susceptible to the worst game purchase of my life.
The game was operation flash-point: Dragon rising. A very cool sounding game. The screenshots spoke of its heavenly demeanor. A beautiful mix between COD BF and the squad play of the tom clancy series. At $4.99 I thought I had stumbled upon the diamond in the ruff. I bought it. As my download completed on the better then usual network speeds im used to I booted it up. Thats when it hit me. The ghost like figures on my screen, the sharp detail the thousands of pixles displaying in ultimate joy the HORRER within. My god what have I done? the tearing was improbable the texture maps looked like my sisters failed attempts at a decent lasagna.
It was a sham I had been had. I tried for hours is my quiet room the sound of typing and the slow burn of a somewhat decent cigg in my mouth only ruined by the taste of stale air in my mouth as I held my breath waiting, no pining for the configuration changes to apply. The screen when dark the echos of a 256bit audio stream making my speakers scream with a loop only nascar could love. The PC had frozen. Frantically I rebooted slamming my finger on the delete key hoping it was me, hoping I had killed the beast, maybe I missed something some minute detail a mhz here a mV there. It was all stability. Foolishly like a coke whore I was convinced it would all be fine in the end.
My god how foolish. For the next 2 hours the game bucked and rolled no driver on the planet could calm the monster and no amount of ciggs could change the way I felt. Then it happened. I was in. My prayers answered and my memory void of all the other games I purchased. I was high on the feeling of calming the beast. I played and I played hard. Something was nipping at my though something deep within. I had finally found it. It was all around me. 2d bitmaps. The bushes were lack luster. The mouse acceleration was all fucked up.
My squad mates were about as intelligent as the rock that bullets could go through. I was being shot. no support the map was fubar. Reloading took to long for a second i was almost certain I was using a hawking. I was dying fast I saw one of the squad get shot i the knee a killer blow for sure. Except it actually killed him. This was madness I ran up to the house took down one or two men, I cant remember its all hazy. Then i was inside. I miraculously walked through a wall. The hesitation was killer, Literally I was shot given my depth perception and the tracer round which I knew I disabled Id say it went through my neck.
I spawned the second time wasn't much better level 1 map 1 area 1 a bloodbath till the very end. Not one to give up I raced I strategically Placed I had more suppressive fire then the seals, but I might as well have been a beached wale I was pinned. The best I could muster was staying alive. I went for it. I made the men push I ran around taking the flank. I got them all except the twins in the small shack. frag out one ran the other didn't notice the impending doom.
Target acquired. I ran after the other. blind fire has a better name. shooting with eyes closed. I was so close I sprayed bullets ahead of me I got down to about 4. I stop he swings around I take to the red dot to guide me straight and true. He shoots im hit I strafe left blood on the screen but im still moving my legs working on sheer will. I steady and take aim. I got him upper chest 2" below the neck. 10ft out ill make the shot and he will drop like a comet. The bullets whizzing by I breath in this is it. ban ba ba ba ba ba ba ba
Audio loop the game crashed. I never figured out what happened that day. Everything else worked fine. The benchmarks the games the music. I never went back though. its just one of those memories. the ones you cant talk about the ones you hope you'll never remember.

I had to go back and re-read this. Very awesome story, and made me lol.

Solaris17 · Nov 20, 2011

Solaris17 said:
snip

It was 0137 EST zero hour.I was enjoying a cig or 2, quietly browsing the steam store. While my investigation of the current deals proved fruitful I came across what I thought was a jewel. While my cart was almost completely full brimming with the new binaries I had managed to purchase on my mediocre salary I was cheerful and soon to be susceptible to the worst game purchase of my life.

The game was operation flash-point: Dragon rising. A very cool sounding game. The screenshots spoke of its heavenly demeanor. A beautiful mix between COD, BF and the squad play of the tom clancy series. At $4.99 I thought I had stumbled upon the diamond in the ruff. I bought it. As my download completed on the better then usual network speeds im used to I booted it up.

That's when it hit me. The ghost like figures on my screen, sharp detail of the thousands of pixles displaying in ultimate joy the HORRER within. My god; what have I done? The tearing was improbable the texture maps looked like my sisters failed attempts at a decent lasagna.
It was a sham, I had been had. I tried for hours in my quiet room the sound of typing and the slow burn of a somewhat decent cig in my mouth, only ruined by the taste of stale air as I held my breath waiting, no pining for the configuration changes to apply.

The screen went dark. The echos of a 24bit audio stream making my speakers scream with a loop only nascar could love. The PC had frozen. Frantically I rebooted slamming my finger on the delete key hoping it was me, hoping I had killed the beast, maybe I missed something some minute detail a mhz here a mV there. It was all stability. Foolishly like a coke whore I was convinced it would all be fine in the end.

My god how idiocy. For the next 2 hours the game bucked and rolled no driver on the planet could calm the monster and no amount of ciggs could change the way I felt. Then it happened. I was in. My prayers answered and my memory void of all the other games I had purchased. I was high. High on the feeling of calming the beast. I played and I played hard. Something was nipping at my though, something deep within. I had finally found it. It was all around me. 2d bitmaps. The bushes were lack luster. The mouse acceleration was all fucked up. My squad mates were about as intelligent as the rock that bullets could go through.

I was being shot. No support the map was fubar. Jesus reloading took to long, For a second I was almost certain I was using a hawking. I was dying fast my god help, I saw one of the squad get shot in the knee a killer blow for sure. Except that it actually killed him. This was madness. I ran up to the house took down one or two men, I cant remember its all hazy. My mouse hand clenched around my mouse like a girl protects her virginity. Then I was inside. I miraculously walked through a wall. The hesitation was killer, I was shot given my depth perception and the tracer round which I knew I disabled Id say it went through my neck.

I spawned, The second time wasn't much better level 1, map 1, area 1 a bloodbath till the very end. Not one to give up I raced, I strategically Placed, I had more suppressive fire then the seals, but I might as well have been a beached wale I was pinned. The best I could muster was staying alive. I went for it. I made the men push. I ran around taking the flank. My heart racing the grass crunching beneath my feet. I got them all, Except the twins in the small shack. Frag out. One ran the other didn't notice the impending doom.

Target acquired. I ran after the other. Blind fire has a better name. "Shooting with eyes closed." I was so close, I sprayed bullets ahead of me. I got down to about 4. I stopped he swings around I take to the red dot to guide me straight and true. He shoots.. I'm hit I strafe left blood on the screen but im still moving, my legs working on sheer will. I steady and take aim. I got him upper chest 2" below the neck. 10ft out ill make the shot and he will drop like a comet. The bullets whizzing by I breath in this is it. Ban ba ba ba ba ba ba ba.

Audio loop the game crashed. I never figured out what happened that day. Everything else worked fine. The benchmarks the games the music. I never went back though. its just one of those memories. the ones you cant talk about the ones you hope you'll never remember.

Here I fixed it for you.

System Name	Dean Machine/2020 Ryzenfall
Processor	Intel 4790K/AMD Ryzen 5800X
Motherboard	MSI 1150 Gaming mATX/Asus ROG STRIX B550-F Gaming Wifi
Cooling	Cooler Master Hyper 212 LED/SilverStone AH240 AIO
Memory	16 gigs Crucial Ballistix Tactical Tracer/32 gigs G.Skill TridentZ NEO DDR4
Video Card(s)	Gigabyte 1660 Super/EVGA GTX 1080 FTW Hybrid Gaming
Storage	Crucial SSD 256 and 2TB spinner/Dual Samsung 980 Pro M2 NVME 4.0
Display(s)	Overlord 27" 2560 x 1440
Case	Corsair Air 540
Audio Device(s)	On board
Power Supply	Seasonic modular 850 watt Platinum/EVGA T2-850 Titanium
Software	Windows 10 Pro/Windows 10 Pro

System Name	Desktop\|\| Virtual Host 0
Processor	Intel Core i5 2500-K @ 4.3ghz \|\| 2x Xeon L5630 (total 8 cores, 16 threads)
Motherboard	ASUS P8Z68-V \|\| Dell PowerEdge R710 (Intel 5520 chipset)
Cooling	Corsair Hydro H100 \|\| Stock hotplug fans and passive heatsinks
Memory	4x4gb Corsair Vengeance DDR3 1600 \|\| 12x4gb Hynix DDR3 1066 FB-DIMMs
Video Card(s)	MSI GTX 760 Gaming Twin Frozr 4GB OC \|\| Don't know, don't care
Storage	Hitachi 7K3000 2TB \|\| 6x300gb 15k rpm SAS internal hotswap, 12x3tb Seagate NAS drives in enclosure
Display(s)	ViewSonic VA2349S \|\| remote iDRAC KVM console
Case	Antec P280 \|\| Dell PowerEdge R710
Audio Device(s)	HRT MusicStreamer II+ and Focusrite Scarlett 18i8 \|\| Don't know, don't care
Power Supply	SeaSonic X650 Gold \|\| 2x870w hot-swappable
Mouse	Logitech G500 \|\| remote iDRAC KVM console
Keyboard	Logitech G510 \|\| remote iDRAC KVM console
Software	Win7 Ultimate x64 \|\| VMware vSphere 6.0 with vCenter Server 6.0
Benchmark Scores	Over 9000 on the scouter

Processor	Intel Core 2 Quad CPU Q6600 @ 3.0 GHz (OC)
Motherboard	Something outdated
Cooling	Liquid Cooling
Memory	6076MB DDR3
Video Card(s)	NVIDIA GeForce GTX 460
Storage	4 x 320GB (RAID 0)
Display(s)	Dual 24" LCD Monitors
Case	A box of some sort
Audio Device(s)	SB Audigy
Power Supply	750W
Software	Windows 7 Ultimate x64

System Name	Dean Machine/2020 Ryzenfall
Processor	Intel 4790K/AMD Ryzen 5800X
Motherboard	MSI 1150 Gaming mATX/Asus ROG STRIX B550-F Gaming Wifi
Cooling	Cooler Master Hyper 212 LED/SilverStone AH240 AIO
Memory	16 gigs Crucial Ballistix Tactical Tracer/32 gigs G.Skill TridentZ NEO DDR4
Video Card(s)	Gigabyte 1660 Super/EVGA GTX 1080 FTW Hybrid Gaming
Storage	Crucial SSD 256 and 2TB spinner/Dual Samsung 980 Pro M2 NVME 4.0
Display(s)	Overlord 27" 2560 x 1440
Case	Corsair Air 540
Audio Device(s)	On board
Power Supply	Seasonic modular 850 watt Platinum/EVGA T2-850 Titanium
Software	Windows 10 Pro/Windows 10 Pro

Processor	Intel Core 2 Quad CPU Q6600 @ 3.0 GHz (OC)
Motherboard	Something outdated
Cooling	Liquid Cooling
Memory	6076MB DDR3
Video Card(s)	NVIDIA GeForce GTX 460
Storage	4 x 320GB (RAID 0)
Display(s)	Dual 24" LCD Monitors
Case	A box of some sort
Audio Device(s)	SB Audigy
Power Supply	750W
Software	Windows 7 Ultimate x64

System Name	Runs Smooth
Processor	FX 8350
Motherboard	Crosshair V Formula Z
Cooling	Corsair H110 with AeroCool Shark 140mm fans
Memory	16GB G-skill Trident X 1866 Cl. 8
Video Card(s)	HIS 7970 IceQ X² GHZ Edition
Storage	OCZ Vector 256GB SSD & 1Tb piece of crap
Display(s)	acer H243H
Case	NZXT Phantom 820 matte black
Audio Device(s)	Nada
Power Supply	NZXT Hale90 V2 850 watt
Software	Windows 7 Pro
Benchmark Scores	Lesbians are hot!!!

System Name	Quantumville™
Processor	Intel Core i7-2700K @ 4GHz
Motherboard	Asus P8Z68-V PRO/GEN3
Cooling	Noctua NH-D14
Memory	16GB (2 x 8GB Corsair Vengeance Black DDR3 PC3-12800 C9 1600MHz)
Video Card(s)	MSI RTX 2080 SUPER Gaming X Trio
Storage	Samsung 850 Pro 256GB \| WD Black 4TB \| WD Blue 6TB
Display(s)	ASUS ROG Strix XG27UQR (4K, 144Hz, G-SYNC compatible) \| Asus MG28UQ (4K, 60Hz, FreeSync compatible)
Case	Cooler Master HAF 922
Audio Device(s)	Creative Sound Blaster X-Fi Fatal1ty PCIe
Power Supply	Corsair AX1600i
Mouse	Microsoft Intellimouse Pro - Black Shadow
Keyboard	Yes
Software	Windows 10 Pro 64-bit

System Name	RogueOne
Processor	Xeon W9-3495x
Motherboard	ASUS w790E Sage SE
Cooling	SilverStone XE360-4677
Memory	128gb Gskill Zeta R5 DDR5 RDIMMs
Video Card(s)	MSI SUPRIM Liquid X 4090
Storage	1x 2TB WD SN850X \| 2x 8TB GAMMIX S70
Display(s)	49" Philips Evnia OLED (49M2C8900)
Case	Thermaltake Core P3 Pro Snow
Audio Device(s)	Moondrop S8's on schitt Gunnr
Power Supply	Seasonic Prime TX-1600
Mouse	Lamzu Maya Grey
Keyboard	Monsgeek M3 Lavender, Moondrop Luna lights
VR HMD	Quest 3
Software	Windows 11 Pro Workstation
Benchmark Scores	I dont have time for that.

System Name	Black Panther
Processor	i9 9900k
Motherboard	Gigabyte Z390 AORUS PRO Wifi 1.0
Cooling	NZXT Kraken X72 360mm
Memory	2 x 8GB Corsair Vengeance RGB Pro DDR4 3600Mhz
Video Card(s)	Palit RTX2080 Ti Dual 11GB DDR6
Storage	Samsung EVO 970 500GB SSD M.2 & 2TB Seagate Barracuda 7200rpm
Display(s)	32'' Gigabyte G32QC 2560x1440 165Hz
Case	NZXT H710i Black
Audio Device(s)	Razer Electra V2 & Z5500 Speakers
Power Supply	Seasonic Focus GX-850 Gold 80+
Mouse	Some Corsair lost the box forgot the model
Keyboard	Motospeed
Software	Windows 10

System Name	Main
Processor	Ryzen 5950x
Motherboard	B550 PG Velocita
Cooling	Water
Memory	Ballistix
Video Card(s)	RX 6900XT
Storage	T-FORCE CARDEA A440 PRO
Display(s)	MAG401QR
Case	QUBE 500
Audio Device(s)	Logitech Z623
Power Supply	LEADEX V 1KW
Mouse	Cooler Master MM710
Keyboard	Huntsman Elite
Software	11 Pro
Benchmark Scores	https://hwbot.org/user/damric/

Steam Skyrim Contest !!

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