Steam Skyrim Contest !!

[burtram]

The worst game I've EVER played, had to have been Dungeon Lords on PC.

The ENTIRE skill tree for the healer type, did NOT work at launch... it had to be patched.

Then the supposedly random dungeons that were claimed to exist on the back of the box, didn't actually exist in game until a few patches later, a few months or so after the game was out.

One time I had started over, because I got stuck behind a door that was trying to open, but was pushing me into the corner of the room, and the door would NOT swing the other way, until it finished its original closing... Then when I started the new character, a dragon came from over the mountains and started attacking my newly made level 1 character, and about after an hour of shooting at it with arrows/spells, it dies and I gain a ton of levels.

This game alone, has made me check who published the game I am about to buy, because if it is Dreamcatcher, then I will NOT buy it, until I know for absolute sure, that it is not a POS like Dungeon Lords was.

This game, is my benchmark for bad games, I have yet to find anything close to as bad as this, that I have played, or owned.

 

[Delta6326]

Game: The Elder Scrolls IV Oblivion

Why: I had to apply a mod so I could get naked girlz... and shank them from behind..


JK shanking is bad

Um...

I was trying to make fun of the mod that someone made for Oblivion:shadedshu. It's a great game and I played it on Xbox so you can't mod anyway.

 

[JC316]

Hands down the worst game I have ever played on PC is Far Cry 2. I loved the first one and it was on sale for $5, so I figured what the hell, right? Yeah, that is like saying, I will stick my dick in a light socket, what the hell, right?

So the game opens up and I am in a shady hotel and apparently, I have contracted the herp or some other random disease. I look around for a Tridgent that might have given it to me, but no. Then I go through a hazy combat sequence where I die 5 fucking times thanks to all the motion blur.... What the shit is this?!?! Farcry 1 was hard, but this is insane... Finally get past that and they I am told that I have to look for factions and help them..... At this point, I quit the game to make SURE that this is a far cry game...... Title says far cry 2, so it MUST be related to Far Cry is some way right? Maybe it will get better. So where was I? Oh yes, help factions out, to do this, you must drive 100 clicks to the other side of the map and kill some random asshat.

At this point I am starting to get the sneaking suspicion that this is Grand Theft Auto: Jungle edition, but I figure what the hell right, it might get better. So I start driving. I quickly find out that the traffic laws are FUCKED UP in this game, get shot to death for failing to yield at a checkpoint. Knowing that the laws are fucked up, I reload the game and kill every last son of a bitch at the checkpoint before they have a chance to ask for my license and registration. Next up, my car is broken down, "Hold f to fix your car", being a mechanic, I think SWEET, I get to fix it. I found out that I want to be a mechanic in a world where you can fix a cracked engine block by tightening down the distributor with a pipe wrench...

So finally, I get to the other side of the island where I have to kill some asshat. My gun breaks down RIGHT when I don't need it to, I knew that I should have bought more quality shit. Die 10 times and finally get it right. Now I am going back to get my reward and I happily speed through the checkpoint where I killed all of those fuckwads, only to die by the fresh new set of fuckwads that appeared out of nowhere.

I have finally had it, I uninstall the game and start making plans to sue for false advertising.

 

[Homeless]

The worst game I've played recently is probably Alchemy. The entire game is just matching different "elements" together to form a new compound or whatever. I have no idea how that game has 4.5 / 5 stars as it's quite possibly the most boring thing i've ever played.

 

[qubit]

Hands down the worst game I have ever played on PC is Far Cry 2. I loved the first one and it was on sale for $5, so I figured what the hell, right? Yeah, that is like saying, I will stick my dick in a light socket, what the hell, right?

So the game opens up and I am in a shady hotel and apparently, I have contracted the herp or some other random disease. I look around for a Tridgent that might have given it to me, but no. Then I go through a hazy combat sequence where I die 5 fucking times thanks to all the motion blur.... What the shit is this?!?! Farcry 1 was hard, but this is insane... Finally get past that and they I am told that I have to look for factions and help them..... At this point, I quit the game to make SURE that this is a far cry game...... Title says far cry 2, so it MUST be related to Far Cry is some way right? Maybe it will get better. So where was I? Oh yes, help factions out, to do this, you must drive 100 clicks to the other side of the map and kill some random asshat.

At this point I am starting to get the sneaking suspicion that this is Grand Theft Auto: Jungle edition, but I figure what the hell right, it might get better. So I start driving. I quickly find out that the traffic laws are FUCKED UP in this game, get shot to death for failing to yield at a checkpoint. Knowing that the laws are fucked up, I reload the game and kill every last son of a bitch at the checkpoint before they have a chance to ask for my license and registration. Next up, my car is broken down, "Hold f to fix your car", being a mechanic, I think SWEET, I get to fix it. I found out that I want to be a mechanic in a world where you can fix a cracked engine block by tightening down the distributor with a pipe wrench...

So finally, I get to the other side of the island where I have to kill some asshat. My gun breaks down RIGHT when I don't need it to, I knew that I should have bought more quality shit. Die 10 times and finally get it right. Now I am going back to get my reward and I happily speed through the checkpoint where I killed all of those fuckwads, only to die by the fresh new set of fuckwads that appeared out of nowhere.

I have finally had it, I uninstall the game and start making plans to sue for false advertising.

I think you should just go postal.

 

[Irony]

http://dl.dropbox.com/u/34835733/Pictures/pics 001.jpg

So i'm scrolling through the forums, get to page 2 and I'm like, "WHOA, GIRL!!! And its a pretty one too!! I haven't seen one of those since I joined TPU! Could it be because I've spent my waking life here? Nah."

And then I noticed that Dannibus Hasn't posted anything since then. And then I think to myself, "he must've decided that women are almost as good as peices of silicon and gone to get himself one." And then I thought "was he really that diluted? Silicon is obviously of superior quality."



I'll probably die for that.

Edit:
As for worst game, I only play the good ones.

 

[crazyeyesreaper]

I find it funny everyone thinks im a shoe in to win this contest.... ive read all the entries theres better ones then what i posted for sure.

 

[Iceni]

The worst game I have ever played on PC is EVE online.

The game is stunning visually, The Interface is complex, and the world is highly detailed.

The learning curve is frankly insane But i persisted, Learned how things worked, What the various skills did, How to get my ships, money, and fight.

However the game is lacking not in content, but in gameplay.

For an online, huge imersive world where you can do anything go anywhere and be anything you want to be, Why oh why do i always find myself doing the same 3 missions regardless of where in space i go.

Firstly there is a kill mission... Go here find out you need a better ship, Get a better ship, tool it up and kill, Awesome! until you get into a decent enough ship that the game changes from been a fight to a damage mitigation contest.

Secondly there is a collection Quest... Go here collect this! awesome till you realise that you need a Different ship with different gear. So you get the ship and the gear, Go out kill a couple of mobs, then Start up collecting for a short time.... Mission done.

And finally there is the Survival mission. Go here and Last for X time, Again great when your on the learning curve, But once you get a ship that can Deal with the level 4's then you have maxed out what your capable of solo.....


So you may think go for the all important level 5's!!! Well you could but there for multiplayer, And no one bothers with missions, they go into Harder open areas and grind on random spawns. So there is no played level 5 content.

This gives the game on average the learning time of the Battle cruiser as playtime solo. So in 6 months if you haven't found a corporation, Or something to do in game your basically a floating space fairing loser along with the countless other floating space fairing losers.

I think the reason it failed me so badly is content. I have played wow and the endgame content is pap, But if you took your time getting to the end the levelling was pretty good, Go here, talk to this faction, kill some nice looking creatures, encounter some pretty nice bosses, Enjoy a well rounded story with a very polished world that runs seamlessly into itself.

Morrowind was another top game, Spend a few weeks doing the main story, go all over the island, kill Dagoth, then go back to Balmora... and try some of the other stuff. The game never ends content wise. You walk in any direction for 5 mins and someone somewhere comes and asks for help... There is a complete world there.

Eve should be an awesome game, It's had Development time, It's had cash, and more importantly it has some user created content.... So where are the system battles, Refugees, The battle lines between factions, And the immersive missions outside of the main story line (which was pretty dull) to make you feel you are living in a real world with people rather than machines....



I then though i was missing the point of the game, and Invited a friend to come join me in Eve, and we would learn something new! He signs up, we get rolling on our builds!!! were going to be miners and crafters woot!!!! After another 3 months he quits.... Turns out the game is pretty boaring after you mine your first few chunks of Veldspar....

Maybe i missed the point, I don't know, maybe the game wasn't handed to me on a silver platter, with a side of onion rings and a cold beverage.... But the game could have been so so much more, and it turned into a 2 dimensional, totaly unimersive, flop for me!

 

[qubit]

@Iceni

I'll second that. In fact, while I created a character and started flying around, I couldn't get into it at all and the whole learning curve was far too much to be fun. I just gave up after a few attempts.

But it sure looks gorgeous!

 

[Ahhzz]

Tribes : Vengeance

So, I was looking this morning to see if anyone knew about the Tribes:Ascend beta going on, and found a short, 4-response thread. In this thread, I found my entry. I couldn't really think of a game that just really sucked. I've played some like Painkiller:Overdose that really just didn't do it for me, and a few console crappers, but nothing that really stood out as an "Oh my GOD that game SUCKS!!".... And then I read the T:A thread, and I found my salvation. To quote my response to some poor misguided person...

shame on you. T:V was one of the worst abortions of a video game I've ever seen. It was the leftover from michael bay eating himself, starting with his toe jam, and finishing with the head cheese crammed in his ear wax.

This refers to Tribes : Vengeance. When Tribes 2 came out, around 2000 or 2001, I was early into the game, and got sucked in at once. By 2004, We were looking to T:V to revive a slowly dying Monarch. On October 5, 2004, T:V was released to great acclaim, and much dismay to the Tribes community. Dynamix had sold to, or been bought by, Vivendi, and they had SCREWED us. The game play was abysmal. The inventory system, which is how you choose your class and suit for the game, was BROKEN upon release!!! They had to patch it a few weeks later to make it work, and the nightmare still continued. In March, pending a second or third patch, they simply cancelled support, and said "Suck it, losers!!!" Basic gameplay was broken, play was unbalanced, and the Tribes community took a collective kick in the nuts, and limped back to the T2 servers, where the Dynamix team took pity on us, and eventually released T2 for free download.


So, that's my sob story, and my entry to the event. Tribes:Vengeance. I'm sure there are other games out there similarly abandoned by their developers, but I doubt many so quickly, and none that I know of.

 

[douglatins]

Thats a tough one, since i cant remember my bad gaming experiences as much as the good ones, especiallly on the PC, my worst one was from a game i bought at the supermarket at age 10, installed the game, it was so ugly, pointless, awful, first person/RPG/Myth but failed at everything so much i played for 10 minutes, uninstalled, broke some cd's and use the rest as cupholders, which later went to a school arts project

 

[qubit]

Thats a tough one, since i cant remember my bad gaming experiences as much as the good ones...

Hint: make it up and make it good. Here's an example.

 

[Deleted member 3]

Just play Big Rigs and write about your experience -> Free Skyrim. You're winner!

 

[Widjaja]

Harley Davidson - Road to Sturgis PC

I remember thinking, yeah a Harley game!
Harley's are known to be heavy handling, well.....when you have the pressur sensitivity of a keyboard and a draw distance of what seems 100m there is plenty of opportunity to bail and die.

The amount of time I would slowdown to try and pick up some chick hitchhiker only to find I either ride straight past her or ride straight into her, bail and die.

Then some random level pops up where I have to make it up a hill while someone throws pigs down to make me fall off my bike.

Because of the countless head-ons with cars, women hitchhikers and pigs I never made it to Sturgis.

----

Was going to add this as the entry but it the conditions make it void.
Still it was a shitty game:-
Crossbow - The Legend of William Tell for Amiga

 

[mlee49]

The worst game ever is The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion, that damn game sucks because I played for 75 hours straight and all I did was create a character.

I tried to fight the bad guys but dagnabit every time there were these aliens...

and well needless to say...

I was kinda confused to say the least.

I could go on for days but DantheBanjoman's dial up internet is getting killed by my pictures.

I dont want this game, all the ads make it look like the best game ever invented and the graphics are pretty but they aren't in-game graphics and I've already stalked dungons and killed many-o-dragons.

 

[Bjorn_Of_Iceland]

The worst game I ever played was GodsWar. It was this 'free' browser based mmo rpg that I tried for the lulz. Game was so bad that it went passed the horrendous guage, back to good, then pointed back to redline bad again. Walked around, asked some people in game for some nude pictures of them, then typed '/slits wrist' in the global chat. Aparently its negative aura was rubbing off on me. Alt+f4.

 

[DannibusX]

And then I noticed that Dannibus Hasn't posted anything since then. And then I think to myself, "he must've decided that women are almost as good as peices of silicon and gone to get himself one." And then I thought "was he really that diluted? Silicon is obviously of superior quality."

I didn't post anything because most images are blocked by my works firewall/network set up.

Hard to fap to a little red x.

I find it funny everyone thinks im a shoe in to win this contest.... ive read all the entries theres better ones then what i posted for sure.

You're a total shoo in to win this contest because of the fact that the worst PC game you've ever played is every PC game you've ever played.

Kreij should honestly change the thread title to "Sweet Contest to give Crazyeyesreaper a free copy of Skyrim over Steam".

 

[brandonwh64]

I didn't post anything because most images are blocked by my works firewall/network set up.

Hard to fap to a little red x.

I embiggen the picture your requested

 

[DannibusX]

I embiggen the picture your requested

Yeah, but I haven't been able to gander at it yet :/

Thank you good sir!

 

[Black Panther]

I'm not taking part in the contest.

So here's what was my worst game, and at the same time one of the best games which I enjoyed in my early teens (talk about girls being confusing, huh? )

Hexen: Beyond Heretic

I was really hooked on the game, addicted I should say. Playing it every chance I got on a 486. I don't even want to remember what graphics card that machine had... :shadedshu

I thoroughly enjoyed the gameplay (I always had a penchant for first person games and in 1992 or whatever year it was the graphics were just awesome, even better than those of Crysis).

But at the same time I'd feel my stomach lurch and turn, ready to throw up any moment I'd keep gaming on, till I was too "sea-sick" to do anything except drop dead in bed.

Later, when I started reading up on how computers work and what could cause sickness in games, I thought perhaps my graphics hardware on the 486 was underpowered for the game. But then I don't remember stuttering or freezing.

I just watched a youtube video. Actually watched only the first 2 minutes and my stomach is all tied up and knotty again! Deja' vu!!

Perhaps it's the way your character 'bounces' while walking? Or the extremely low textures which come up as large squares on your monitor if you get too close? Oh and the "Ugghhmmph" sound he makes if you hit a wall definitely doesn't help either, since it sounds like me suppressing barfing!

 

[qubit]

Yeah BP, I think I can see what made you sick with that game: it's indeed the bobbing up and down. The vertical movement is very large and coupled with the shape of that movement, it does induce a slight feeling of vertigo - and this is coming from someone that doesn't suffer motion sickness in FPS games. I can imagine how playing it for a long time would make the symptoms build up. I normally turn off bobbing whenever possible, because it's annoying.

 

[JC316]

I'm not taking part in the contest.

So here's what was my worst game, and at the same time one of the best games which I enjoyed in my early teens (talk about girls being confusing, huh? )

Hexen: Beyond Heretic

I was really hooked on the game, addicted I should say. Playing it every chance I got on a 486. I don't even want to remember what graphics card that machine had... :shadedshu

I thoroughly enjoyed the gameplay (I always had a penchant for first person games and in 1992 or whatever year it was the graphics were just awesome, even better than those of Crysis).

But at the same time I'd feel my stomach lurch and turn, ready to throw up any moment I'd keep gaming on, till I was too "sea-sick" to do anything except drop dead in bed.

Later, when I started reading up on how computers work and what could cause sickness in games, I thought perhaps my graphics hardware on the 486 was underpowered for the game. But then I don't remember stuttering or freezing.

I just watched a youtube video. Actually watched only the first 2 minutes and my stomach is all tied up and knotty again! Deja' vu!!

Perhaps it's the way your character 'bounces' while walking? Or the extremely low textures which come up as large squares on your monitor if you get too close? Oh and the "Ugghhmmph" sound he makes if you hit a wall definitely doesn't help either, since it sounds like me suppressing barfing!

Yeah, it's the bobbing. I love Hexen and never got sick off from it, but Forsaken on the N64, that one made me very sick to play.

 

[Irony]

@qubit: Angry birds is awesome. How could you possibly not like Flinging a variety of birds through a slingshot into bloated green pigs trying to pop them all for stealing an egg that could've hatched into more totally dispensable Angry Birds???!!

1nsane is one of the worst I've ever played.

 

[Mussels]

worst game i ever played was "TPU"

Its a browser based game that almost requires a triple monitor setup (no eyefinity support!) for multiple browsers open at the same time.

its constant grinding fights based on grammar, spelling, trivia knowledge and comebacks to defend against the fact you're 'upside down' in australia.

Mini bosses up the difficulty drastically, and the boss fights can ban you from the game entirely leaving you forced to buy a new account from a street corner hobo. (he goes by "Erocker")

Even if you win all the fights and become one of the elite few all-powerful 'moderators' your most effective weapon (BanHammer!) has a side effect of 'whinge', wherein all the family members, friends and associates of those that have been hammer-timed, send you private messages (some sort of side quest system, never really explained) where you have to engage in even more grinding battles, except with no reward for victory except a clogged inbox.

I also have the iphone version of the game, but the interface is too slow and it causes more grammar issues, losing me some of the fights.

The one and only redeeming value of the game is occasional challenge missions by Qubit/Kreij.

edit: minimum play time of 6 hours a day. 10 recommended, or you lose some missions by not being there at the right time.

[/end]

 

[Kreij]

Good one Mussels. ROFL
Maybe I'll write up a "TPU game" review in your honor.